I’m Misha McCorkle, a writer who has published one young adult novel, with more in the works. In this blog, I want to share a little about the catharsis of writing fiction.
I do not journal. In fact, I hate journaling. I equate writing out my thoughts and feelings to a personal layer of hell. There’s no better way to wallow in the emotions that already try to take my life captive than slowly detailing them out on paper while my inner turmoil crescendos to a breaking point. Did I already say I hate journaling?
I write fiction, instead. Fiction allows me to look at life from a more rational vantage point. I can safely explore and understand the sorrow and the joy of being who I am by imparting circumstances on a fictional character. I’m kinder to others than I am to myself, so when my characters deal with struggle or victory, I am more lenient and more accepting of them than I am toward myself.
I can also figure out their issues without anxiety, which may sound silly since I’m the one creating their issues, but bear with me.
A good character takes on a life of their own. They make decisions based on who I’ve fashioned them to be, and if I am thorough, they do stuff I wouldn’t do myself. I don’t deal with my own emotional baggage when I’m running through the psychology of other people (or potential people). I run the risk of oversimplifying or misunderstanding them, but it makes better storytelling to let them be who they are.
Let’s say I want a villain to do something evil. I can’t just grab a random guy in the background and say, “He did it!” I need to answer some questions about this guy first. Why did he do it? What’s his backstory? Does he give people the creeps or is he super charming? What’s his psychology? If I can’t buy into the character, then that character is a failure. Sure, we can use a few flat characters like wallpaper, making the main characters more vivid and alive against their flatness, but those folks shouldn’t move the story along. (Great writers often have backstories for obscure characters, too, even if the reader never hears it. It keeps their world consistent.)
By building all of these people then setting their circumstances together, light is shed on my own soul. I’ve grown a lot as a human simply by writing about other types of people.
I’ve discovered that, in my life, some of my actions come from trauma and not from truth. I have never seen myself as evil, but I can do unhealthy or mean things that hurt others. Why do I do that? I found a clue in my writing.
One of my characters is a wealthy, vibrant person who holds a lot of power and does so responsibly. They are always making sacrifices for others to insure everyone under their jurisdiction lives in a system that sets them up to succeed. The problem is, this person has no peers, no one to meet them at their level of burden-bearing. When they do find a potential romantic partner who has all the qualities to meet them where they are most needy, fear and loneliness drive them to manipulate the circumstances around the person they claim to love. They’re not evil—quite the opposite. As wise as they may be, their pain created a bind spot to their tyrannical use of power.
If you can, inject yourself into this person’s reality. Maybe you can see a picture of why someone in your past didn’t trust you. It’s a scary mirror, but one that has shed light for me personally, where journaling only had me scripting the pain of loneliness over and over and over again.
Journaling helps some people work their thoughts out. Good for them. But if you’re anything like me, it might be time to wander into your imagination and analyze others to know more about yourself.
Happy writing!
Misha McCorkle is the author of Elleson, a young adult fantasy novel that explores the themes of trauma, beauty, connection, and faith by bringing together characters that have nothing in common except their stubborn commitment to find the good in each other.
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